I am getting married in 2.5 months. I have conflicted feelings about this.
You are probably thinking I must be NUTS because I am conveying my conflicted feelings for the masses to read. It is probably not what you are thinking.
After Daniel and I were engaged, we had many talks about the wedding. Eloping, immediate family only, immediate/extended family only, destination wedding, and a Houston wedding were all on the table. We eventually decided on a semi-destination wedding. We are getting married in Castroville, Texas. This may seem random to some of you. I am okay with that. We wanted a place that seemed intimate and easy. Most of our family would have to travel anyway, so why not pick a different location. My family moved to a town near San Antonio five years ago and I have grown to love the city. Houston is so fast paced and San Antonio DEFINITELY moves at a slower pace. We found a place outside of the city that is quaint and easy. It is a family owned reception hall and we really liked the caterer and location.
You see, it is MOST important to me that we focus on our marriage as we near January 1st. It is SO easy to get caught up in planning the details of the wedding, that the reason for the day and celebration are overshadowed. Brides and grooms are so tired, they don't enjoy the wedding and can't wait for the honeymoon. I refuse to fall into that category. I feel that if we had been married in Houston, I would have definitely worried about details more. I am thankful for this decision.
You need to understand that this has and will be extremely difficult for me. I am a people pleaser by nature. If people are coming to an event that I am planning, I want it to be perfect. I will worry, sweat, fret, and think about it until it is over. However, I am making an effort to take any spare moment I can with Daniel to talk about our expectations for marriage, finances, compromises, needs, wants, etc. I don't want to spend our spare moments talking about tuxes, flowers, food, etc. It won't matter if we are short on napkins. It will matter if we have not addressed those concerns/expectations for our marriage.
As you can see, I am conflicted. I WANT to enjoy the planning part of the wedding, but I don't want it to overshadow or distract from the marriage part of our life.
If you ask me about how planning is going, I will more than likely reply, "Everything is going well." I am not just saying this. The day will come and go AND I will be married to the man of my dreams. As far as I know, he will be there and I will be there. How can that not go well?
